


The Copper Apple

by Anti_Social_Headphones_Kid



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Family Feels, Gen, Gift Giving, How Do I Tag, I'm Sorry, One Shot, Parent-Child Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-08
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:54:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22170625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anti_Social_Headphones_Kid/pseuds/Anti_Social_Headphones_Kid
Summary: Cynthia is trying to find a gift for Zoe as Connor struggles with his own feelings about his sister
Relationships: Connor Murphy & Cynthia Murphy, Connor Murphy & Zoe Murphy
Kudos: 31





	The Copper Apple

**Author's Note:**

> I made this for the gift exchange on Tumblr, and thought I'd share it here too! this is my first DEH fic, so I hope you all enjoy!!

Connor glanced down into the glass case in front of him, not entirely surprised when nothing stood out to him- all jewelry from these sorts of stores seemed to be the same- overly bright and gaudy, too large and shiny to make any statement other than having the same taste in wardrobe as a crow.

He glanced over at his mom, who was still invested in talking to the salesman, looking at different bracelets as a gift for his sister after her recital the next day… she was invested, so it wasn’t like she’d notice if he just left and went to look around in another store by himself for a while. The only reason he was here was because this was his ride home from his therapy appointment, that’s it.

Giving one more glance behind him at his mom, he decided to leave the store and began to wander aimlessly through the mall- which was almost more annoying than being in the store, since pretty much every step forward he was blocked by some giddy family who seemed to have absolutely no problem with barreling into people. Top that off with pushy kiosk vendors, and this place was an absolute hell-hole.

The one positive about being out here rather than in the store was that he didn’t have to deal with the constant looks of judgement he always felt whenever he stepped foot into what they considered a ‘classy’ store.

He huffed a sigh as another person pushed they’re way past him in a hurry, once again reminding him that pretty much everyone had somewhere to be, somewhere to go, an actual reason to be at this mall- unlike him, who was just walking aimlessly after being dragged to therapy, no real direction in being here, let alone a direction in his life.

He stopped in the sea of people, hardly caring when a few people looked at him oddly before carrying on. He felt like a stone in a sea of people, unmovable as everyone else moved on with their life. Finally deciding to get out of the way, Connor slowly pushed his way through the crowd to the side of the mall where there was a quieter gap he could stand in alone without being in the way of anyone else.

No one really seemed to notice him there though…

* * *

Cynthia was still trying to figure out what to get Zoe when she noticed Connor had left the store.

Instantly worry crowded her mind as she quickly thanked the store clerk for their help, and left the store into the sea of people. She pulled out her phone and texted him, but there was no response, so she kept moving forward, keeping a careful eye out for her son, until she finally caught sight of him and allowed her heart to finally stop beating at such a rapid pace.

“Connor! There you are, I was so worried,” Cynthia said with relief as she walked up to her son, her heart sinking when she saw the dead look in his eyes, realizing that he was less than alright, but not quite sure what to do.

“Did you pick one?” Connor muttered quietly, clearly observing her empty hands in silent dread that they’d have to stay longer to pick something out.

“No, they didn’t seem to have anything she would like,” she said with a smile, hoping that he wouldn’t blame himself for her lack of finding anything- although it was true that she had left the store to search for him, it was also true that she didn’t think Zoe would’ve liked anything in there.

“I think I’ll just look somewhere else tomorrow, it’s getting late.”

“Sorry,” Connor muttered, obviously not oblivious to why they were leaving, causing an uncomfortable silence to fall over the pair as they walked back to the car.

* * *

The car was silent as they drove home, nothing between them other than the coming darkness from the setting sun.

The traffic light up ahead was turned red, so she slowed the car to a stop and looked out the window at the row of stores along the block.

There was an old candy store she used to take Connor and Zoe to, along with a hairdresser, a small Italian restaurant, and an old antique shop- it was one of those shops you always found yourself saying: ‘we should go there one day,’ but you never do, and it eventually closes leaving you to always wonder why you hadn’t gone in.

The light turned green, and Cynthia moved the car forward, but instead of continuing straight, she surprised herself by making a right turn instead and parking along the side of the road.

Connor turned and looked at her questioningly as she reached for her bag.

“I think that the antique shop might have something interesting- you know how much Zoe likes vintage stuff,” She explained. “I’ll be quick, but you can wait in the car if you want,” she reassured.

“I’ll come in,” he replied quietly, unbuckling himself and opening his door, following her lead as they headed into the familiar-yet-new store.

There was a tired-looking woman at the register who smiled as they came in, offering any help if they needed, to which Cynthia accepted as Connor instead opted to look around on his own.

He glanced over a rack of slightly tarnished jewelry, the worn chains looking somewhat comforting, as if they held promises of having at least a few good memories held in their past, while also looking slightly cursed- overall it was a pretty cool vibe if he was being honest.

He fingered through a few of the chains- mostly just because he loved the feel of the cool metal and the small clinking sound- but his hand stopped at one in particular: a light copper chain with a small copper apple at the bottom.

Carefully removing it from the necklace holder, he held it in his hand, tracing his thumb carefully over the pendant, laughing a humourless laugh at himself as he thought about the old apple orchard his family used to visit.

It was a long time ago, an old memory- why did it even matter?

And yet it did matter… any time he could remember being slightly happy sorta did matter to him. He remembered the way Zoe and him would always compete to pick the most apples, but how he would give up and eventually help her get the high ones that she always claimed ‘look the prettiest’. They’re small picnic in the open field where they actually felt like a normal family, how his dad would be there, present, instead of off thinking about work, or his mom, with actual joy in her eyes instead of the desperate hope that ‘her son’ was still there, the kind that he had gotten so used to seeing in her eyes.

It was stupid that he was thinking about all of that.

It was even more stupid that he was standing there with that necklace in his hand, not wanting to let go of it.

The necklace seemed dull and boring compared to what the jewelry store had offered in comparison, but it had a soul to it, it had memories, and for some reason, when Conner held it in his hands, he felt the oddest sense of comfort, like it reminded him of those warm days on the orchard.

Or the same kind of warmth he felt when Zoe asked him to help her get that one apple she thought was the most perfect, even if he didn’t understand the point of why she needed the apple to be so ‘perfect’ (they were just going to eat it anyway…), or when she wanted to show him the first song she’d learned how to play on the guitar, or when she was in her first jazz band concert, and he snuck in the back to watch even though she told him not to come since it’d make her more nervous…

The necklace reminded him of Zoe, the Zoe who had looked up to him, the one who he constantly fought with, the person who honestly was one of the few people he actually liked… it reminded him of her.

He gripped it in his palm, unwilling to let it go.

But what would he do with it?

Sure, his mom was getting Zoe a gift for her recital, but wouldn’t it be strange if he got her a gift too? They didn’t do that sort of thing for each other usually, so would she think he was weird for getting it? Would she even like it?

Cynthia had been looking through the various items that were around the store when she noticed Connor hadn’t moved from his spot for a while now, so she walked over quietly, and caught sight of him carefully examining a necklace, that quite clearly wasn’t his usual style, but it did look like something Zoe might like.

She felt herself smile as she realized that Connor had probably picked it out for Zoe, and stepped up beside him.

“It’s beautiful,” she remarked, looking down more carefully at the bright-yet-dull piece of jewelry.

“Yeah,” he muttered, feigning indifference as he put it back on the rack, only for Cynthia to pick it up again herself.

“I’m sure Zoe would love it- it seems like it suits her.”

“Do you think I should get it for her?” Connor asked quietly, leaving Cynthia wondering if he’d really said it.

“I think it would be nice if you wanted to give it to her,” she stated honestly.

“It wouldn’t be weird?”

“No- I think she would love it,” she replied, offering the chain to him to take, which he grabbed after a moment of thought. She smiled as she watched him walk up to the counter and pay for the item.

Things may not be perfect, but there were still times when she could see the small things that made Connor happy, and something about that necklace, about the thought of giving it to Zoe, something about it had made him have that small glimmer of happiness in his eyes again, and to Cynthia, that was perfect.


End file.
